Better to Lose the Battle and Win the War
Published in the May 2014 issue of Suburb magazine
Teenage is undoubtedly an exciting time in life – It is a carefree phase without much accountability.
However, ask an adolescent and you will get a completely different story. It’s a period of great “storm and stress” in which they are adjusting to all kinds of biological, social, and psychological changes. The world around them is making unreasonable demands in terms of independence, career choices, and peer pressure.
Today’s youngsters lead a virtual life. They may have thousands of friends on Facebook but no real buddy. The bond of friendship can be put at risk if their “contact” does not “like”/comment on their status. They may hang out on “Google Hangouts” but in reality they are lonely.
Cell phones are their life lines. The other day, I observed a group of students from the same college. Each one was wrapped up in his/her phone. I have often heard parents complain that their children connect with them on SMS or WhatsApp even when they are at home. Furthermore, if there is a family gathering at home children remain locked up in their rooms and parents avoid asking them to join the activities in fear of a confrontation.
Today’s youth is turning their back on basic etiquettes and losing the simple art of making conversation.
To deal with this problem, young people need guidance and most importantly, a friend. Parents can fill that void by adopting some of their methods. If children prefer to connect by email/SMS, parents should acquire the know-how.
For instance, confiscating cell phones is not a solution. It will make a child feel alienated from their implicit world and build a lot of resentment against the authority figure which in most cases is the parents. A mobile phone is no doubt, a useful gadget to assure each other’s well-being. If you give in to their demands, let it be conditional. Based on the child’s potential, parents can set attainable goals. This will make them work towards achieving a reward which they will value far more.
To ensure participation of children in family events, make them an integral part of get-togethers by assigning them key responsibilities. Teenagers love attention and appreciation. Once they lose the inhibition, they may actually start enjoying these gatherings.
The idea is to unlock the channels of communication – even if it means provoking an argument! Believe me, it is better than silence. Once communication channels are blocked, problems will only keep mounting.
If you can’t beat them, join them. Who knows, in the process you may stumble upon a world that may transform your own lives.
It is better to lose the battle and win the war.
No comments:
Post a Comment